No. 20: TRIO (Scaphio, Phantis & Tarara)
"With wily brain upon the spot"
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| Scaphio. | Phantis. | Tarara. |
| I think we ought — (whispers) | ||
| Such bosh I never heard! | Such bosh I never heard! | |
| Ah! happy thought! — (whispers) | ||
| How utterly dashed absurd! | How utterly dashed absurd! | |
| I'll tell you how — (whispers) | ||
| Why, what put that in your head? | Why, what put that in your head? | |
| I've got it now — (whispers) | ||
| Oh, take him away to bed! | Oh, take him away to bed! | |
| Oh, put him to bed! | ||
| Oh, put him to bed! | ||
| What, put me to bed? | ||
| Yes, certainly put him to bed! | Yes, certainly put him to bed! | |
| But, bless me, don't you see — | ||
| Do listen to me, I pray — | ||
| It certainly seems to me — | ||
| Bah — this is the only way! | ||
| It's rubbish absurd you growl! | ||
| You talk ridiculous stuff! | ||
| You're a drivelling barndoor owl! | ||
| You're a vapid and vain old muff! You're a vain old muff! |
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| You're a drivelling barndoor owl! | You're talking ridiculous stuff! | |
| A drivelling, drivelling | You're a vapid and vain old muff! | Ridiculous, |
| Drivelling barndoor owl! | A vain old muff! | Ridiculous, ridiculous stuff! |
| All Three. (coming down to audience) |
| So far we haven't quite solved the plot — They're not a very ingenious lot — But don't be unhappy, It's still on the tapis, We'll presently hit on a capital plot! |
| Scaphio. | Phantis. | Tarara. |
| Suppose we all — (whispers) | ||
| Now there I think you're right. Then we might all — (whispers) |
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| That's true, we certainly might. I'll tell you what — (whispers) |
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| We will if we possibly can. Then on the spot — (whispers) |
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| Bravo! A capital plan! | Bravo! A capital plan! | |
| That's exceedingly neat and new! | ||
| Exceedingly new and neat. | ||
| I fancy that that will do. | ||
| It's certainly very complete. | ||
| Well done you sly old sap! | ||
| Bravo, you cunning old mole! | ||
| You very ingenious chap! | ||
| You intellectual, intellectual soul! | ||
| You very ingenious chap! | Bravo, you cunning old mole! | |
| You very ingenious, ingenious | You intellectual | You cunning, you cunning, |
| Ingenious chap! | -Lectual, -lectual chap! | You cunning old chap! |
| All Three. (coming down to audience) |
| At last a capital plan we've got We won't say how and we won't say what: It's safe in my noddle — Now off we will toddle, And slyly develop this capital plot! At last a capital plan we've got We won't say how and we won't say what: It's safe in my noddle — Now off we will toddle, And slyly develop this capital plot! |
Business. Exeunt Scaphio and Phantis in one direction, and Tarara in the other.
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Page Created 9 December, 2005