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The Bar and its Moaning
Fun, II - 9th December 1865
Three publishers journeyed out into the West — | |||
Minster Hall where the Bench and the Bar go down: | |||
Each published the cases that pleased him the best, | |||
And sold them to barristers working in town: | |||
For Bar must work, and tradesmen are deep; So the cases they publish are far from cheap, |
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And in spite of the Bar and its moaning! |
A barrister sat in his chambers drear | |||
And he studied reports which the three took down; | |||
He found them imperfect, and clumsy, and dear, | |||
Yet no others were published in country or town. | |||
And the counsel worked and the publishers slept, And the publishers grinned while the counsel wept, |
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And they laughed at the Bar and its moaning! |
But one morning the counsel his temper lost, | |||
And the publishers' books to the winds he cast; | |||
For he found them increasing in number and cost, | |||
And each was more clumsy and dear than the last: | |||
So the Bar complained, protested, and wrote; But the publishers grinned, and they took no note |
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Of the Bench, and the Bar, and its moaning! |
Then the Bench and the Bar set to work in a trice — | |||
A working committee was formed one day, | |||
And they gathered reports at a uniform price, | |||
Which simplified things in a wonderful way. | |||
Then the counsel grinned, and the publishers wept, And the publishers cursed while the counsel slept, |
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And they swore at the Bar and its moaning! |
So the publishers woke from their golden dream, | |||
And did all in their power the plan to burke; | |||
But while they disparaged the barristers' scheme, | |||
The committee went steadily on with their work: | |||
And the counsel grinned, and the publishers wept As the new reports into favour crept, |
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And they bothered the Bar with their moaning! |
So the publishers come with a scrape and a bow, | |||
And they beg the committee, with many a whine, | |||
To allow them to join the committeemen now, | |||
Which of course they politely but firmly decline: | |||
And the counsel laugh, and the publishers weep, For the new reports are judicious and cheap, |
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So good-bye to the Bar and its moaning! |
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